Today Iz ate porridge.

Not groundbreaking for most toddlers… but for Iz? Monumental.

She ate it without gagging. Without vomiting. Without drama.

This is huge.

Iz struggles with lumps in food — likely because of her early intubation and tube feeding after birth. It’s actually very common in children who’ve had that start. She also finds anything near her mouth or nose really difficult, so even wiping her face can feel like a military operation. We’re working hard to turn it into a game rather than a battle.

But today? She ate porridge.

So go Iz.

In other news, we had our first video appointment with her surgeon and it went really well. So well, in fact, that we’re now moving to annual reviews 😱

That feels big.

Our next major hurdle will be potty training. We’ll understand much more about what we’re facing when we get there.

We’ve also just come back from a few weeks overseas — another huge achievement because I was VERY nervous about travelling with Iz. Predictably, we did have a hiccup: we all caught a cold (and some). And when Iz coughed… she also pooped.

Which, given her condition, is not something you casually ignore.

So of course I asked her surgeon what that might mean long-term. The honest answer? It’s too soon to tell.

I asked whether, as she grows and her muscles strengthen, that might help. He gently explained that her muscles can be incredibly strong — but if the sensation isn’t there, strength alone doesn’t change that.

That was hard to hear.

As we’ve travelled this road, I’ve learned something: the hard truths don’t get softer, but I get better at holding them.

I gave myself a few days. I sobbed. I was angry. I questioned the universe. Then I did (ish) the only thing you can do — I accepted that this is what we have right now.

That doesn’t mean I stop researching the shizz out of ARMs. I will absolutely continue diving into rabbit holes looking for anything that might make even half a percent of difference. That’s just who I am.

But I’m also trying — really trying — not to torture myself with a future that is still very much unknown.

Today was about porridge.

And annual reviews.

And travelling overseas.

And surviving the cold.

Those are wins.

And for now, that’s enough.